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Kids and them not telling the truth


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#1 Eco

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Posted 08 May 2012 - 10:26 PM

Wondering how you folks punish your kids for not telling the truth?

3 times in the past week my 5 year old has been having an issue fessing up to her sins, the last one will cost me some money since she smashed a neighbors window. Granted the window incident was an accident and I could care less about the money but her not telling the truth after 4 people witnessed the event is PISSING me off. I'm more use to my past employees fucking up and in one case handing one of them the "Anger Management" (great movie) and telling him watching it is his punishment.

I just gave my daughter the movie Liar Liar as her punishment along with feeble attempts at saying how bad not telling me the truth is..... I sort of like the Scarlet Rose type of punishment but I'm too lazy to print up a tee shirt with "I'm a liar" on it.....maybe a necklace with a large "L"?

#2 Erinisme

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Posted 08 May 2012 - 11:33 PM

I teach five year olds and they ALL LIE at some point.

What I've found that work is explaining to them 'truth - little bit of trouble, tell a story - whole lot of trouble' I remind them right before the lie comes out of their mouth or right after...are you sure that's your story? Remember our deal.....

#3 Mama Kel

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Posted 08 May 2012 - 11:36 PM

Kids this age are learning the difference between fantasy & reality - in doing so they start lying. It's kinda how they learn. So as frustrating as it is, it's not like when a 10 year old lies. A 5 year old is still learning, so go easy. You could try stories like the boy who cried wolf & stuff like Erin said <3

#4 Jersey Thug

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Posted 09 May 2012 - 02:37 AM

i don't know girls. i think pushing a PG13 movie on a 5 year old could be the way to go.

#5 Eco

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Posted 09 May 2012 - 03:48 AM

<p>Interesting Erinisme....I&#39;ll put some thought into your way.  I have no intentions of interrupting the  creative minds of my kids and the &quot;story&quot; approach might work....</p>
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<p>@mama kel, &quot;so go easy&quot;......thanks for the reminder!  I&#39;m use to dealing with adults and being quick to fire and slow to hire....lie to me and you are gone......can&#39;t do that with my own kids.  For some reason my 10 year old is &quot;perfect&quot; but the 5 year old is putting grey hair on my head at times.  I guess I need to review my &quot;screw up and fess up&quot; policy since I much rather them screw up and fess up than lie to my face.</p>
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<p>@ Jersey, I wish I could of recorded her reflections during the movie and once it was done.....&quot;what are you learning&quot;.....&quot;what did this movie teach you&quot;=my goals!  Shallow Hal worked wonders with my now 10 year old when she irked me 5 years ago.....not suggesting movies are a way to be a parent but rather for me they can teach....but I come on here looking for more....</p>
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#6 nancykind

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Posted 10 May 2012 - 02:00 PM

remain calm, no matter WHAT. especially when they tell the truth. i always found that disappointing a parent is worse than angering them.

#7 Eco

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Posted 10 May 2012 - 09:30 PM

Hmm, how would you suggest being disappointed and not showing it? I'm not talking about yelling or beating(never once touched my kids unlike the way I was raised) but just the reaction of being disappointed and my facial expressions speak more than my mouth.....

#8 Mama Kel

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Posted 11 May 2012 - 01:05 AM

look stoic & act calm. no matter how you feel <3 easier said than done

#9 vinandtonic

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Posted 12 May 2012 - 05:44 PM

one of the worst things my parents said to me was "we're so disappointed in you". try that.

#10 nancykind

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Posted 19 May 2012 - 01:20 PM

sorry didn't see your response sooner Eco but, why wouldn't you want to show your disappointment in their behavior?

#11 Eco

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Posted 19 May 2012 - 04:46 PM

Nancy, I think I missread your post the first time. For some reason I thought it was suggesting not to act disappointed. Generally the "when you -blank- I feel -blank" works well for kids and adults but this one works on a different wave length.

Oh.....the good thing is I've had zero issues with her not telling the truth since I started this thread. Next up is that Shallow Hal movie for other issues.