So it's pretty much unanimous among the women in one of my local SF social circles that once you've dated one person in the circle, that's it, you're ruined for all others because apparently it causes some sort of social awkwardness.
I don't buy it. Never been the case in any other social circle I've been a part of. I refuse to accept this bullshit.
Have you ever heard of such a thing?
. . . and I always wondered why so many women date mostly from internet dating sites instead of from people they meet with common interests. . . with rules like these, it's no wonder they have to resort to that.
"The rule of the circle"
Started by
Julius
, Mar 06 2012 06:25 AM
58 replies to this topic
#5
-
- VibeTribe
- 6,308 posts
Posted 06 March 2012 - 02:47 PM
if we're talking about a group of friends (not random acquaintances) then i agree w/ your lady friends. personally i've never felt comfortable dating a friend of an ex, but that's just me. and if an ex started dating one of my friends i'd be pissed at both of them.
ok, i'm not gonna lie i did once (only once!
) mess around w/ one of my exes friends, but we never dated
ok, i'm not gonna lie i did once (only once!
) mess around w/ one of my exes friends, but we never dated
#7
-
- VibeGuide
-
- 15,874 posts
VibeGuide
Posted 06 March 2012 - 03:04 PM
Yeah, I have heard of it and I dont necessarily buy into it, but I can respect those who do.
Some good friends of mine would have never found each other in that sense, if they had followed that rule though.
Difference between love with long-term potential and "dating."
#10
-
- VibeTribe
- 12,864 posts
Posted 06 March 2012 - 03:52 PM
Seems like people with this rule would be the highly jealous types that enjoy gossiping about other people's relationships as well as their own.
But what do I knowI've never heard of this "rule" before.
You say this now, but when I have a howling pack of Betties flaying me, you n' I are gonna have words, woman.
#16
-
- VibeTribe
- 7,915 posts
- LocationQuiet Corner
Posted 06 March 2012 - 04:53 PM
Clearly not!
And I don't care. But I can't help thinking she might be poisoning the water for no reason I can understand.
Aha! That where you going wrong; you think you can understand them and/ or they are logical:lol:
JBetty 
#45
-
- VibeTribe
- 12,072 posts
Posted 06 March 2012 - 10:39 PM
i've heard of it, but never understood it. i figure we're all friends for a reason and can be expected to make good decisions for ourselves for the most part. if a good friend was thinking of dating someone i had bad history with, who hurt me or another friend in an inexcusable way, i would hope they'd take the warning as it was intended and not as sour grapes for something that didn't work out. other than that, who my friends date is completely up to them, and they're welcome to just about any ex of mine, minus the one or two who aren't fit to date anyone, let along my nearest and dearest 
#49
-
- VibeTribe
- 12,072 posts
Posted 07 March 2012 - 12:22 AM
How about before you are aware they are an ex?
in that case either they weren't a very close friend of mine to begin with (since i was unaware) or it wasn't a significant relationship between them (ditto) and either way my personal code would be satisfied, in most cases. if it was ancient but significant history, i'd ask my friend about it, and proceed with caution.
if i was falling in love, well, that's a game changer. only the closest of friends or family would hold any sway if i thought i'd found my person. i love y'all, but compared to what i have with Jason? i'd risk a lot for a chance at that.
but somehow i suspect we're not talking about love, here.
