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parents of adhd kids


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#1 cj

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Posted 02 February 2012 - 02:14 PM

got any pro tips for dealing with teachers/advocating for your child? we're having a bit of a go this school year. if you are more comfortable discussing via pm, please do. :)

#2 Mama Kel

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Posted 02 February 2012 - 08:36 PM

I'm not a parent of one, but I am a special ed teacher who has transitioned dozens of kids w/ adhd into the school system. I've also been the classroom teacher of kids w/ adhd.

First off, I hope your school is handling this well & not jumping to drugs immediately - sadly many do. If they are doing that, know that there are a LOT of 'therapies' and modifications that can help. I forget - are you in NY state? If so, there are a lot of laws they have to follow as well

Does he get any services (OT etc?) If so, tap into the OT - they have so many sensory things they can do to help kids with this - just a few off the bat:

use a playground ball, inflate it just enough so that he can sit on it without touching the chair. This mimics a stability ball, makes the child use core muscles to stabilize himself & thus helps to organize his system & calm him down. Can use wedge mats etc but I find the ball to be more effective

Weighted vests/lap pals - you need an OT to do this b/c you need the right amt of weight & limits on time BUT the deep pressure the weight provides helps kids to calm down & organize themselves

Give him heavy work - not to be confused with having him just run around - fill a backpack with books that's heavy & have him deliver it to the library & vice versa - again the weight will help organize & calm him. Plus he will think he's doing a job, not 'therapy'. You can do this at home - fill a suitcase w/ heavy things & have him carry it up the stairs, pushing the vacuum, lifting & carrying heavy boxes etc.

Deep breathing in cold air - get him running around so that he breaths deeply outside in the cold air - the cold air helps the sensory system - not exactly sure how - but even just 5 min of this during the day will help

I have a lot more ideas & a lot of experience w/ this so feel free to PM me. Details will help me help you <3

#3 In A Silent Way

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Posted 02 February 2012 - 09:43 PM

504 accommodation plan

#4 cj

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Posted 04 February 2012 - 01:07 PM

we're in canada so the terminology is a little different. these are all good ideas, mama kel. i will be pm'ing you about this.

we are in limbo... it is a weird situation. the school is good. very good. his teacher, well, i will be diplomatic and just say that my mother taught me if i can't say anything nice... ;)

i met with the principal in december after witnessing a very disturbing incident in which jeremy was treated very poorly and extremely unfairly by his teacher. i demanded an iep for him in order to help deal with problematic behaviours in a more constructive manner. the principal was very understanding and supportive and i have heard nothing since. apparently ieps will often arrive with a report card so that they can be reviewed and be the main topic of discussion at the next p-t interview. that should be next friday. so we shall see.

a referral for OT has been submitted, so far all we have gotten out of it is a package of papers on how to get our child to print more neatly. :plain:

a referral for an itinerant EA has been submitted but it takes a long time to come through. :plain:

in the meantime, j is in a class in which over 40% of the children have an "identified exceptionality" including j -- and his teacher treats him like he is just a kid who refuses to behave, i.e. the pain in her butt that just won't go away. every time we have come up with something as a strategy to help him (like errands carrying heavy things to other parts of the school) she takes it away as a "consequence."
and then gets more frustrated with his behaviour. then she takes away recess as a consequence. and then gets more frustrated with his behaviour. no matter how we try to intervene and advocate, she has found a way to continue doing it "her way" which for some reason always seems to be to j's detriment. :bang:

we will be switching schools very soon as we moved out of this school's district in the fall. however, we wanted to have him stabilized with paperwork in place prior to starting at a new school. the teacher appears to be pushing him out the door, and yet no paperwork. *sigh*

#5 mamapajama

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Posted 04 February 2012 - 02:56 PM

Carla, as you may know I am an OT (haven't with kids in awhile though). In the states, OTs in schools sometimes only focus on the activities directly related to pre-writing/ writing skills (restricted by philosophy, money, etc.) but there are others that also focus on sensory integration (the things mama kel is describing). I know it can be very frustrating for parents and sometimes they have to go outside of the school resources.

Here is the website that may be helpful:

http://specialchildr....com/index.html

#6 Mama Kel

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Posted 04 February 2012 - 06:46 PM

This is horrible. So soory he & you have to go through this. I would talk to the principal again. She should not be allowed to treat him this way. If the principal doesn't do anything, I'd go to the superintendent - or the papers!

In the states, there has to be a meeting w/ the parents involved to generate an IEP. If you can, you want to make sure that his adaptations are in the IEP & therefore cannot be taken away as punishment.

I would really push the district to get his paperwork in place. In the states an IEP is a legal document & the schools can be held accountable for not following it. Definitely PM me - I'll try to help any way I can. Look into getting a parent advocate too <3

#7 sarah b.

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Posted 12 February 2012 - 08:13 PM

:heart:

#8 Misha

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Posted 20 February 2012 - 01:45 PM

I would also make sure to have a "Paper trail." Whatever letters, corrospondences you get, keep in a folder. My friend June had to FIGHT the school for some very specialized tests for her son and luckily she had saved all of the paperwork which made it possible to get the tests done (she actually ended up writing to everyone including the Superintendent).

Jeremy is a great kid and his teacher sounds like a nitwit:hit:

#9 freerange

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Posted 25 February 2012 - 01:18 AM

well the iep is done and it is wanting to say the least
we are adding quite a bit to it...as a living document we should be on the right road once we add what we need to.
one week left with the teacher we can't say many nice things about

#10 Misha

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Posted 25 February 2012 - 02:05 PM

Thanks for the update:heart:

#11 Shutterbug

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Posted 04 March 2012 - 05:34 PM

As the mother of a much older ADHD child - there are a few things I can look back and see much more clearly -

When Patience was very young the school pushed meds - almost as a must due for "our part" of treatment and it took years to work our way through meds and then finally out of them again - they all had side effects and the ups and downs were worse then letting her process naturally. We used the IEP as - instructions to best teach her - and presented this understanding in every meeting. I hated the labeling process and focused on - how she is wired - It wasn't until Jr High that a social worker was able to term it in a way PJ could understand ~

It wasn't about her being different - cuz everyone is
What was presenting the biggest challenge in her behavior was that one second delay between that she thought & what she did
She explained that many ADHD children say & do things before the thought is complete - loosing their ability to filter the positive & negative
so we made a little index card sign that she could hold on her desk - one side had a symbol for good idea & the other a symbol for bad idea and we used that to help with her filtering process .. having something in her hand to help her focus was great ..

This is one of many little tricks we used along the way .. I find now that those little baby steps of behavior modification are the things she still uses today (at almost 18) - we started working with early intervention services when she was only 3 years old & was recovering for a major trauma - that work seemed to lead directly to testing & labeling... which helped her get services but sadly the paperwork would get to new places before she would and teaches far too often acted as if they knew "the type" and how to handle her ... so everywhere she went I advocated for them to see and understand HER before deciding they knew how to handle her ~ J is lucky to to have such mindful & supportive parents :heart:

#12 Mama Kel

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Posted 04 March 2012 - 11:36 PM

I hate when teachers jump to conclusions based on reports & IEP's :sad:

I never read mine. I would scan for pertinent health info (allergies etc) and that's it. I always read the IEP's about 2 to 3 weeks after they started in my class. I have seen ridiculous goals, reports etc. You never really know who they're coming from.

Now that I work in EI, when I write goals for IEP's of kids I work with entering the school system, I put very generic goals & very few

#13 freerange

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Posted 05 March 2012 - 01:49 PM

thank you for the index card idea Shutterbug

That's it Mama Kel...i want to make the document something real to help my son get through this institution with something gained
as opposed to ridiculous theoretical points that have no real basis in the classroom.

Jeremy started at his new school today, i'm very nervous for him but i should not be i guess as he usually does really well before his comfort level gets the better of him.
i am glad work has layed me off for Jeremy's transition.

#14 Mama Kel

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Posted 05 March 2012 - 02:55 PM

well that process is SUPPOSED to be a team effort - with parents as an EQUAL part of that team. So fight for every modification!! Make sure they are in that document, b/c then they are held to honoring it.

#15 In A Silent Way

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Posted 05 March 2012 - 03:38 PM

And remember, despite your best effort, some kids turn out like this.

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#16 Mama Kel

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Posted 05 March 2012 - 08:00 PM

And remember, despite your best effort, some kids turn out like this.

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:rotf: as long as mine don't wear really short shorts, I'm okay with that

#17 Shutterbug

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Posted 06 March 2012 - 02:21 AM

So how did his 1st day go?
(and love your perspective on the job :jamguy: )

#18 freerange

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Posted 06 March 2012 - 01:23 PM

1st day was a hit what with the three way basketball nets and private primary entrances. they even let him sit at a desk with the other kids.
he's very happy not to have to be doing things differently than all the others...i really hope he strives to continue that. I don't mean to say i hope he conforms with everything i just think he likes to not be centred out and segregated by a study carroll away from everyone.
With all the running around we did before this week to get him downtown and to his grandma's every morning extra early so we could get to work he was getting rundown i think.
He seems happier.

#19 freerange

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Posted 06 March 2012 - 01:24 PM

And remember, despite your best effort, some kids turn out like this.

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:lmao:
Jeremy does tell jokes like Bob

#20 cj

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Posted 07 March 2012 - 12:35 AM

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