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Please.. some prayers or vibes for my mom..

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#1 Occifer Boland

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 12:18 AM

.. my mother found out this week she has breast cancer...  had she not been stubborn and went to a doctor 10 years ago; this could have been dealt with in an easier manner...  i am sorry to be posting here.. it's my only way of venting and letting it out... my wife is not understanding in these moments.. she's never had sickness or death in her family... while in the past 15 years.. i have lost my father, brother, . closest uncle, two grandparents and my best friend, whom was my deceased brother's first girlfriend(andrea..bubblechick) .  ya know.. the more i think of it.. vibes..prayers?? they don't really help... that goes with "Hope"...  life is life.. and death is part of it... in 1998, i watched my father die, everyday... he battled his colon cancer for almost 2 years.. but it was cause he was a fighter... god, prayers.. that didn't help him.. i am sorry that i am not much of a "believer" right now... but, like i said.. if my mother had this breast cancer treated 10 years ago.. then she could survive... but, now... it's a matter of short time... and i fucking hate having to lose my whole fucking family in a short span of time....    i love all of you, boardies... you have ALL helped me through so much... i apologize for being so bitter..   i just have nowhere to vent or turn to tonight.

#2 Occifer Boland

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 12:23 AM

..and i apologize again.. nothing against you people that believe in prayer and alternative methods of dealing... but in reality.. prayers are not what saves people.. it's being proactive... getting the proper treatment.. and willing to fight.. my largest apologies for those on here, whom i love SO MUCH.. who have had their battles with cancer... please don't hate me for my ranting about this right now.

#3 megmyster

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 12:23 AM

Vent away :heart:

#4 gregoir

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 12:24 AM

Sometimes you need to let it out. I'm always here to listen. :heart:

#5 KrisNYG

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 12:32 AM

Seriously, vent away!  In my ever humble opinion, you have the right to be mad at your mom for not getting checked out.  Time happens, fear happens.  My dad pulled the same shit with his health and now, he's gone.  If you can bring yourself to do so, please try to not be angry with her.  I went from hugging my dad to yelling at him.  I am so sorry you're going through this.  I've been told I have to go in for one of those fancy mammograms this Monday.  I thought about canceling.  I will not do so after reading this.


Love and strength to you, and your mom.  :)

#6 Tim the Beek

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 12:36 AM

It's hard not to get angry sometimes...we're *very* lucky to still have Mom the Beek around after she went far longer getting checked out than she should have.

You and yours are in my thoughts. <3

#7 Royal

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 12:36 AM


It's a lesson to every one of us, we need to get medical exams regularly. Vent as much as you need.

#8 Java Time

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 12:41 AM

Sickness, disease, and death suck...vent all you need! Much love to and for Momma Boland and you :heart:

#9 Karen

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 12:47 AM

You have much to vent about.


Thinking of you :heart:

#10 Occifer Boland

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 12:58 AM

i am not angry at my mother at all...   in 1998 i was there till the end of a long 2 year battle my dad dealt with of colon cancer... and i hated him for not getting checked many years before.. and he refused treatment and continued to just die.. .. so for my dad.. i was angry... but with my mom... i dont feel anger... just sad she didn't go to doc earlier... i have gained HUGE amounts of respect for my step-dad who has been at her side 24/7 for the past 2 weeks... but he is not helping me by saying that the only thing that will help her is.."prayer"..  he is a very religious man.. and i have nothing against that... but prayers don't save lives.. family, treatment, and just the individual fight is what saves.

#11 hippieskichick

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 01:04 AM

Many strong vibes to the Boland family. You WILL get through this. ((((OB + MomB))))

#12 Phishfolk

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 01:15 AM

So sorry man!!!  My dad just got over cancer he got frovietnam...agent orange... he is my hero.  he signed up for two tours.  the second tour was because he says kids would have died if he didn't go back  Much love and hope to you and your mom.  I know this has got to be so hard for you.

#13 Occifer Boland

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 01:27 AM

Phishfolk....... Thank you! Hope all is well

#14 Eddie Z

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 01:28 AM

Hoping for the best possible outcome.  

#15 tyedyedee


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Posted 22 August 2013 - 01:37 AM

love to you, my friend :heart:

and we all will listen to you vent, as friends should :wink:

#16 Occifer Boland

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 01:37 AM

Thanks Eddie!!! You are who kept me sane when my son was sick

#17 Jwheelz

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 01:41 AM

:heart: love to you man, you're a good dude and this has to hurt... vent away my friend :)

#18 twilight dancer

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 02:25 AM

Sending all my love to you and your momma, Chris.

it's a bitch of a disease. I'm sorry she has to join us.
Can I please suggest she get in touch with the ladies at Mary's Place by the Sea---- ? It's in Ocean Grove and a super place for women with cancer- and all their services are free. They are amazing <3

Will be thinking of you.... xo
I'm here and local if you need any help. <3


#19 little frog

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 02:45 AM

<3 you are all in my prayers .. hoping for the best possible outcome.

#20 Occifer Boland

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 02:46 AM

thank you all....  brianne... my step-dad has already been in touch with that place in ocean grove for her!!!!   thank you for the added props to the place

#21 Kashmir

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 02:56 AM


#22 territoryranger

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 03:13 AM

No apologies needed man.....My Grandfather had lymphotic cancer,,,he beat it but was so weak from therapy,he died of pneumonia....my father has been batteling prostate cancer for 5 years now...he has good days but his suffering takes its toll on him and the family,,,,,,,,,so I can relate......best wishes to your mom,,,,,,,,it would've been better to catch it earlier,but the past is gone.don't beat yourself up about it,just help her move forward through this............

#23 china cat

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 10:35 AM

that's an awful lot of loss you've experienced. I'm really sorry, no one should suffer all that, especially at your age.


I tend to agree with you regarding the praying to save/heal people - not convinced at all this changes circumstances, but I do wish you personal peace as you navigate this difficult time.

#24 nancykind



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Posted 22 August 2013 - 10:44 AM

so sorry Chris.   that's a lot of loss you've had in a short time.     sending you lots of good vibes, and peace to you and your family.   :heart: :heart:

#25 Spidergawd

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 12:06 PM

Lots of love to you and the family.  You have a lot of love here if you need it.  :heart:

#26 Joker

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 12:07 PM


#27 KittyKindBud

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 12:10 PM

So sorry to hear this.....enjoy every day with your mother that you have....

#28 u.s.blues

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 12:27 PM


#29 elder

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 12:45 PM

Hey Chris, just reading this now, and I am so sorry to hear what you and your family are going through.

And like the rest of this wonderful community, I am here for you. To lean on, to vent, whatever my brother that you need.

#30 scarfire

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 12:56 PM

i'm sorry about your mom, occifer.   :heart:

#31 MeOmYo

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 01:04 PM


#32 concert andy

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 01:11 PM

((Occifer mom))



#33 cassady



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Posted 22 August 2013 - 01:13 PM

<3 <3 <3

#34 vinandtonic

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 01:26 PM


#35 jnjn

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 01:34 PM

i'm so sorry to hear this.  all the best to you & your family, occifer :heart:

#36 Depends

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 01:37 PM



Im the last one that believes in prayers, but will will tell you the positive vibes that come from this community do wonders.  


The prayers and vibes didn't save my brother, but the positive vibes helped me by untold measures.  I will never forget, nor could I ever repay...


Sending a ferris wheel full of positive vibes your way...



#37 seany

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 01:38 PM

<3  Sorry to hear this, Chris. It's ok to be bitter. We're here. Vent all you want if it offers some stress relief.


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Posted 22 August 2013 - 01:51 PM


#39 Lemireacle

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 02:02 PM

Sorry to hear this.  Positive vibrations to you and your family!! :heart:

#40 Lostsailr

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 02:11 PM

Sad to hear, but glad you are venting.  I think when there are so many strong emotions running at stressful times, it takes a lot to even process how we feel. Time  is such a key in cancer treatment, 10 years is like an eternity.  I hope you find some peace inside yourself as time passes. For now, vent and rage as needed.(((((((((((((((((((((((((OB)))))))))))))))))))))))


(my mom just had a PET scan for suspect spots on her lungs... just had a lung section out 3 years ago...and 2 separate mastectomies,  a hysterectomy...and yet she still smokes...yea, I have some mixed emotions on the subject.)

#41 Feck

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 02:12 PM


#42 namaste

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 02:45 PM

Hey ((((OB + OBfamily))))))


This is the place to vent...friends are the best medicine!  I don't believe in prayers in the traditional sense, because life/death happens to us all.  That's just science.  But, I am hoping for your heart to be touched and your love for mom to shine and carry you, her and your family through this hard hard time.  Love is stronger than anger, however justified.   Love each other and enjoy whatever time you have.  And take good care of yourself!  Your children will appreciate that. xoxoxoxoxoxo

#43 shadeelady

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 03:15 PM

:heart: :heart:

#44 TEO



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Posted 22 August 2013 - 03:49 PM

Love, Light & Inner Peace  :heart:

#45 CTMuleman

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 03:56 PM


#46 chefjeff

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 03:56 PM

Vent away.


Cupcakes dont cure things and they dont stop pain but they do create smiles! 




Go get her a cupcake :)



#47 JBetty

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 05:53 PM


#48 DF

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 06:03 PM

so sorry to hear dude  <3

#49 georgi

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 06:14 PM

Lots of love to you and your Mom and your family. :heart:

#50 Feesh

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 06:30 PM