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What do you really want from your toilet paper?


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#1 Tabbooma

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Posted 10 February 2013 - 07:23 PM

Tabbooma would love longevity but will settle for comfort, cartoons or writing on it would be nice too ;)



#2 insolent cur

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Posted 10 February 2013 - 07:24 PM

a brief yet comfortable interaction.



#3 TEO

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Posted 10 February 2013 - 08:24 PM

Dingle berry removal



#4 August West

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Posted 10 February 2013 - 08:25 PM

i want it to be there when i need it



#5 Ginger Snap

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Posted 10 February 2013 - 08:48 PM

I feel like I've finally moved into the middle class because I can afford to buy softer TP and find it to be a worthy endeavor. No more ass scratchies for me!



#6 nikkiblue

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Posted 10 February 2013 - 11:43 PM

I don't want linty tp.  Linty tp sucks. 



#7 August West

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Posted 10 February 2013 - 11:44 PM

I don't want linty tp.  Linty tp sucks. 

 

you know what's worse than Linty TP ?



#8 musicfan

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Posted 11 February 2013 - 12:16 AM

Strong enough to prevent a finger poke thru...  Musicfan is not a finger poke thru fan...



#9 Eco

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Posted 11 February 2013 - 12:30 AM

Oh...my favorite subject other than sex in porto johns. 

 

It must be soft in case I have to use it several times a day.....the anus should be treated like a fine delicate rose, not wiped with sand paper cheap stuff.

 

Like Musicfan said, it should never allow a poke thru.  shaking shoulders, that nasty and not clean...

 

The two references to linty......yup, nothing worse than dining at the y and consuming those. 

 

Access to good toilet paper is a basic human right and it's about time we start to start a revolution so no human is forced to wipe with cheap crappy TP.  Lol, I say that as I'm planning a trip to a country that has NO TP in public bathrooms and in most cases no toilet seats.....toilet seats are another basic human right.



#10 Java Time

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Posted 11 February 2013 - 01:05 PM

....maybe say something nice about the bowel movement it is involved with

#11 In A Silent Way

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Posted 11 February 2013 - 02:18 PM

The same thing I want from my pharmaceuticals: safety and efficacy. 



#12 BHB

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Posted 11 February 2013 - 02:26 PM

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#13 concert andy

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Posted 11 February 2013 - 02:51 PM

Are you threatneing me?

 

I need TP for my bunghole!



#14 Julius

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Posted 11 February 2013 - 08:42 PM

I guess I haven't given it as much thought as so many of you.  :lol: 

 

One or two ply, I don't care, I'll just use twice as much. A slightly gritty sandpaper-like texture helps me to know that it's working properly. Too soft, and it dissolves and that's nasty. 



#15 TakeAStepBack

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Posted 11 February 2013 - 08:57 PM

I like a good grit paper with some traction on it, but soft enough to keep me from scratching the touch hole for hours after use. Then I'd like for it to be easy to break paper on a new roll without that disasterous waste when the "glue" half works too good and it looks like the cat had fun with the roll. Otherwise, I'd prefer it's withiin arms reach when needed.



#16 Gypsy Bob

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Posted 11 February 2013 - 09:16 PM

A generous portion of Chocolate Mousse with Corn please.



#17 roo

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Posted 11 February 2013 - 11:54 PM

Its gotta have a strong durable inner tube for those lonely nights in a holding cell and the roll is your pillow for the night!!

#18 nikkiblue

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Posted 12 February 2013 - 02:23 PM

you know what's worse than Linty TP ?

 

 

What? 



#19 unbroken_chain

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Posted 12 February 2013 - 03:08 PM

asswipe



#20 Lazy Lightning

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Posted 12 February 2013 - 08:39 PM

I haven't read the whole thread, but I'm hoping no one asked for their TP to put a chocolate on their pillow every night... :undecided:



#21 JBetty

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Posted 12 February 2013 - 08:47 PM

I haven't read the whole thread, but I'm hoping no one asked for their TP to put a chocolate on their pillow every night... :undecided:

 

 

I don't think so, but the guy who cleans the bathrooms here will occasionally tape a mint to the top of the lid of the toilet.