119 replies to this topic

[Depends]

I don't know Jon. I met him for a minute or two at a boardie picnic.
My observation, and by no means a judgement, is that while being cold/hungry/lonely add in some Christmas/Family blues can push someone to contemplate suicide. I also read the original post as (another) cry for help. Perhaps from someone who doesn't know how to ask for it, or even accept it. TtB said it well. Throwing away your pride might be the first step, but at least there are other steps after that. Jumping off a bridge is one step, only.
As far as I can see, Jon needs to find that place within himself. Whether that is going to a church, or shelter or someplace else. The will to pick yourself up must over power the will to stay down.

Best of luck Jon. Choose wisely. Your friends here have your best interests in mind.

[Tim the Beek]

As someone who lived in profoundly selfish ways as a younger man, I hope Quinn finds some way to see things less selfishly. The irony isn't lost on me that by becoming less selfish, we can save ourselves...

[Depends]

I like living. Hope to live to the age of when gregoir posts loli'moldpeople

[unbroken_chain]

I found my very very best friend with his head blown practically clean off his damned shoulders.... I have been, to a large degree, deeply affected by this since that day in 1984. For one, and *some* of you may have noticed.... I do not become very close to any one person. I have since that day been a loner. I'll never forgive him and forever miss him....

my point, I guess is.... don't be a pussy bro.... and don't break my heart, please.

[Ginger Snap]

I found my very very best friend with his head blown practically clean off his damned shoulders.... I have been, to a large degree, deeply affected by this since that day in 1984. For one, and *some* of you may have noticed.... I do not become very close to any one person. I have since that day been a loner. I'll never forgive him and forever miss him....

my point, I guess is.... don't be a pussy bro.... and don't break my heart, please.

[Tim the Beek]

This. Closest thing I ever had to a brother shot himself. But it was 2/3 of the way across the country, and he'd been making an effort to keep out of touch with those of us who loved him for a long time.

UC

[KrisNYG]

The fact of the matter is that there IS help out there. However, a person has to be willing to accept the terms of that help and admit underlying problems and address them.

There are always options.

A friend of mine was homeless (before I knew him). Chose to leave what little he had behind to move to CT to be near his child (ex moved here). He knew no one and stayed in shelters so he could have access to showers and a place to sleep, all within walking distance to be able to see his kid. Worked TERRIBLE jobs to keep current with his child support. After about four months or so, he found a very good job and was able to be on his own shortly after. He said he had to accept the help that was out there on "its" terms, not his own.

As Kashmir said, there are always options. They may not be the prettiest but they are out there. And quite frankly, what you're doing is not working. It's time to do things differently, but you'll only do it if you truly want to find a way out of this.

[unbroken_chain]

Hell Quinn, this will be the second time I've offered you a place...my digs in Buffalo are small... there are few jobs, but there are some GREAT soup kitchens and if you were to do the unthinkable (cut yer hair ) The people I work with are VERY well connected and If I said "I need you to get my friend some work" .... I'm willing to bet it would happen. I met you one time at vibes; liked you cuz you, like me... are a rager.

[Java Time]

I say this not as a judgement...merely as an observation...it's profoundly selfish to have made the original post in this thread, and a day later have had the means to check in and not done it.

Profoundly.

Indeed


...I understand he may have cried wolf in the past..but a cry for help is a cry for help and should never be taken lightly and I hope he is finding help he needs on FB...and I hope he's not on there to get more "jump" replies because people on here are trying to help and give hope.

[TheDHJ]

If you look at the last thread from August, we all offered help. He always refuses it. Always. He won't accept help from his dear friends in Albany. That part doesn't make sense to me.

You come into a place desperate, on your knees begging for help, an then tell those offering it to fuck off.

The only way things will change are when Jon cuts the shit and steps up to the plate or jumps off the bridge. People here are overly generous, take them up on their offers!!

[Tooozday]

Sometimes a person needs to be told they are valuable and wanted, even if they then don't really believe you.

[unbroken_chain]

not just sometimes, often.... I make a solid, and probably annoying point - to overwhelm my kids with how valuable they are.... and I do the same whenever possible to the gen-pop.... anyone on my FB know's I can be a bit over the top with the LOVE ALL gush.... but I am not even kidding.... it's critical for our survival as a worthy species or whatever we are.

[HABIT]

has anyone even picked up the phone and contacted the authorities..a 51/50 hold on him for 72hrs might do some good.

[unbroken_chain]

that's a tricky one for *me*.

I understand the intent.

Put me in a cage and I change. for the worse.... but then again I am not of the self inflictional variety.... my aim is true.

[TheDHJ]

I made a comment about contacting the authorities on page one. It went ignored.

[Tim the Beek]

Last time this happened, I made a call. I was apparently a dick for having done so, so all I have left to offer is vibes, prayers, and advice.

[TEO]

Last time this happened, I made a call. I was apparently a dick for having done so, so all I have left to offer is vibes, prayers, and advice.

Rev Jim was a dick when he call the authorities re: another boardie who was threatening to take their own life. I have since read that said boardie is grateful, although I am not certain if that gratitude was expressed directly to Rev Jim.

[unbroken_chain]

but ya'll are right... u can't have it both ways. Put's "us" in one helluva pickle.

[SunshineDrummer]

I made a comment about contacting the authorities on page one. It went ignored.

Someone did last time and caught hell for it from the OP. I guess I can understand not wanting to this time around.

[Tim the Beek]

Rev Jim was a dick when he call the authorities re: another boardie who was threatening to take their own life. I have since read that said boardie is grateful, although I am not certain if that gratitude was expressed directly to Rev Jim.

Don't care about gratitude, but we each reap what we sow, and if I'm told help is specifically unwanted, and, as it was suggested at the time, detrimental, then I'm not inclined to offer the same help again unless I'm asked for it.

[TheDHJ]

I'll call the cops...everyone thinks I'm a douchecake anyway...won't be anything I'm not used to

[TEO]

Don't care about gratitude, but we each reap what we sow, and if I'm told help is specifically unwanted, and, as it was suggested at the time, detrimental, then I'm not inclined to offer the same help again unless I'm asked for it.

Very much in agreement.

[TheDHJ]

Very much in agreement.

You always say detach with love and all that happy horseshit. I have a hard time doing that I guess.

[hoagie]

[Tim the Beek]

Nothin' to do with bein' a douchecake or not, for me Josh. Somewhere along the way, we each have to become responsible for reaching out and asking for help. Pretty much a rule of thumb for me across the board that if I try once, and am told the help is unwelcome, that I won't try again unless asked.

[TEO]

You always say detach with love and all that happy horseshit. I have a hard time doing that I guess.

Tell me that after you are instrumental in saving someone, to then be by their side for a long slow painful death.

[hoagie]

If someone wants to end it all, isnt it there right?

[TheDHJ]

Tim, what I was saying was that people think I'm a douchecake in general, so one more person espousing that sentiment won't really make a difference. I'm used to hearing it.

I get what you mean though. You can only stick your neck out so much until it gets cramped.

[TheDHJ]

Tell me that after you are instrumental in saving someone, to then be by their side for a long slow painful death.

Sorry Renee. Didn't mean it that way.

[Tim the Beek]

If someone wants to end it all, isnt it there right?

Surely it is.

Doesn't mean doing so isn't selfish, and doesn't terribly hurt those who are left behind.

Having a right doesn't mean that exercising it to its fullest is always the best choice.

[TakeAStepBack]

Josh, don't be an unwanted interventionist.

[Tim the Beek]

Tim, what I was saying was that people think I'm a douchecake in general, so one more person espousing that sentiment won't really make a difference. I'm used to hearing it.

[TheDHJ]

Josh, don't be an unwanted interventionist.

As opposed to an unconventional conventionalist?

[TEO]

Thanks Josh, each of us must do what we think highest and best in such a circumstance.

All best for OP finding the path best for him.

[melissaphish]

Jon, just my .02, but I wish you would find a food kitchen and get a hot meal in you before you do anything rash. Life always looks a little better with a full belly. I know that I don't function at my top when I am hungry, and if I hadn't eaten for days I would be making some pretty bad decisions.

Please.

[roo]

The last time this went down I personally called jon, i offered to immediately get in the car drive to NC and bring him all the way bac here where he had a place to stay, food to eat and many job opportunity.

when he was in jail i drove there to visit hours and hours away only to be turned away for being FIVE MINUTES late, i sent books and magazines. none of this he did for me. i did it because NO one wrote me or visited, i knew how ot felt.

since then.. deleted from fb, told im the one who owes an apology.

Jon.. grow the fuck up. get yourself clean and sober, thats half your fn illness right there.

[Java Time]

no...killing yourself is against the law!!!

If someone wants to end it all, isnt it there right?

their

[PeaceFrog]

well, all I can say is that if you do it, the 2nd Amendment will be defenseless and no one will ever be able to get a gun ever again.

Jon and I were friends in person, and had heated debates even in person, but still remained friends.

He defriended me on facebook after this past gun debate...

so... se la vie or something like that

it's sad, but it won't be the first idiot friend who has left this world and moved on to another.

[HABIT]

some of you are fucking disgusting, hoping someone kills themselves because they defriended you on facebook are you that fucking clueless? Human life Vs Facebook, Get a grip on reality, The first thing that happens when someone transitions is that everyone here jumps in the thread and says oh I miss them I wish I could have done something, and here you are pretty much adding fuel to the fire. i hope he doesn't do anything some of you should be ashamed of yourselves.

[TakeAStepBack]

I feel ashamed.

[musicfan]

Someone mentioned he was in NC.. If its in the Charlotte area I would be more than happy to meet and feed him from time to time...

[Java Time]

I feel dirty...and it's not even feral swingers night at Java's folks house:undecided:

[PeaceFrog]

I doubt he's going to kill himself, and no I don't hope that he does kill himself.

However, I'm not sure why he posted here first. I mean... just hurry up and get it done. Don't fuck with the rest of us.

He's done this several times, and has alienated anyone who gives him any sympathy.

Go ahead. IM him HABIT. I really wish you would, and maybe you can get through to him.

But seriously, don't say that I hope he kills himself, because I don't. I just wish he'd stop with his pity party and conform a little bit. He could make some minor life changes and his parents would probably take him back. He could clean up and get a job. He's got both arms and legs and a fully functional brain -- so really... it's pathetic.

I normally don't judge, and I'm trying my best not to judge this situation here... but how can someone in such dire straits take the time for 2 days after a horrific tragedy to argue in favor of the NRA and get all pissed off at anyone who disagrees? Now he's going to kill himself? The whole thing is stupid. I'm sorry I ever replied to this thread.

[Kashmir]

Yes Jon deleted me from facebook but I in no way want him to hurt himself. I want him to seek and accept help. Just sayin'.

[Java Time]

Someone mentioned he was in NC.. If its in the Charlotte area I would be more than happy to meet and feed him from time to time...

I believe they make heated bowls to keep food and water from freezing outside!

[PeaceFrog]

Jon, I'm sorry for being harsh, but you really are your own worst enemy.

You can not live life on your own terms if you don't have the means to do so. Just accept that and the help you are offered. I have seen it for myself that you have had several offers throughout the last couple years.

Maybe you need medicine for depression. Maybe your thyroid isn't working right, that can affect your mood. Whatever it is, don't be stubborn. Get help.

All I can say besides that is if you decide to go the other direction, then see you in the next one.

[Occifer Boland]

everyone... take a step back, please... this has now turned into a "soap opera" with the exception of those like Roo and others who have personally attempted help physically... i think we need to all just pray for him.. and just hope he makes it through this tough time...it's obvious that he is crying for help.. albiet, negatively.. but maybe all he needs or needed was to just see the responses on here to know that people care... happy holidays, quinn... be well. it's obvious how many care about you.. be strong to delete some of the negativity in your life.. phone a friend, brother.. final answer..

[Java Time]

some of you are fucking disgusting, hoping someone kills themselves because they defriended you on facebook are you that fucking clueless? Human life Vs Facebook, Get a grip on reality, The first thing that happens when someone transitions is that everyone here jumps in the thread and says oh I miss them I wish I could have done something, and here you are pretty much adding fuel to the fire. i hope he doesn't do anything some of you should be ashamed of yourselves.

I think you're confusing people who know him's frustration with ill will.....jmho

[Tim the Beek]

has anyone even picked up the phone and contacted the authorities..a 51/50 hold on him for 72hrs might do some good.

Did you?

[BHB]

Yikes.

Then again I think these threads usually end up this way.

Tim... You are a wise fellow and a great guy!

Randy... Awesome to see how you've turned your life around.

Jon... Check in with those who care about you.