Posted 27 December 2012 - 10:14 PM
Being raised by a mentally ill parent until the age of 12 then being tossed into the system I have a little insight from the kid's perspective. It is hard. It is confusing. It also tends to be passed on and learned. There is also damage that can occur from not being able to be around that parent, especially after living with them until the age of 13.
What can you do? You can make sure that your child knows that because Mom is dealing with something does not mean they have to suffer. When they are feeling alone, anxious, scared, upset, depressed, sad, or left out to come to you. To go to a good person who will listen if not you. Teach them why people deal with these issues and what they mean to others and society as a whole. Arm your child with knowledge and show them how to grow and learn without imitating behaviors they need not pick up. Try to do with without making your ex out to be some kind of freak. But this could strengthen the bond between you and your child when handled with grace. This could teach them acceptance, nurturing, tolerance, independence, and how to overcome obstacles early on. Use this as a tool for learning rather than a situation to be dealt with. Showing your stability and sound mental/emotional health will give a sense of trust and security to a potentially chaotic situation.