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Is anyone here friends with Jonathan Miller?


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#51 Depends

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Posted 24 August 2012 - 12:58 PM

Sgt. Timothy Hammonds, you are AWESOME!

this. x10

#52 blindmule

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Posted 24 August 2012 - 01:23 PM

I am just curious - I have known Jon ince we were kids, he was my best friend for many years...
What happens when they find him? They lock him up somewhere? Put him back out on the streets?
At what point do you have to just allow someone to make the decisions that they make for themselves? If the same pattern of behaviour repeats time and time again despite constantly receving help from people time and time again and a person doesn't seem to want to make any real attempt to change and correct when do you just let go and say - "hey it's your life do as you will?"

33 years old?
50 years old?

Just curious...

#53 Tim the Beek

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Posted 24 August 2012 - 01:28 PM

I know a guy who's pushing 60. Been through 40+ detoxes and rehabs, and is 8 or 9 years clean and sober now...

#54 Tim the Beek

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Posted 24 August 2012 - 01:30 PM

Sgt. Timothy Hammonds, you are AWESOME!


This

#55 TEO

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Posted 24 August 2012 - 01:37 PM

blindmule, some folks gave me the advice that it is okay to detach with love. :heart:

#56 Wende

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Posted 24 August 2012 - 02:05 PM

You folks are way better people than I am.....:lol:

#57 Kashmir

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Posted 24 August 2012 - 02:22 PM

I'm so glad you all have rallied together and alerted the authorities.
This is an amazing community and even if Jon is upset at the response, as long as a life is saved it will have been worth it.

#58 Terry Bo Berry

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Posted 24 August 2012 - 03:12 PM

I hope you read this Jon!! <3

#59 insolent cur

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Posted 24 August 2012 - 03:27 PM

I hope you read this Jon!! <3


this! lots of folks here really do care about you, jon. i promise not to check for a wrist band when i next see you. ;) :heart:

#60 PeaceFrog

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Posted 24 August 2012 - 05:15 PM

I am just curious - I have known Jon ince we were kids, he was my best friend for many years...
What happens when they find him? They lock him up somewhere? Put him back out on the streets?
At what point do you have to just allow someone to make the decisions that they make for themselves? If the same pattern of behaviour repeats time and time again despite constantly receving help from people time and time again and a person doesn't seem to want to make any real attempt to change and correct when do you just let go and say - "hey it's your life do as you will?"

33 years old?
50 years old?

Just curious...


well it's different for each person.

if you've given all you can, and you can't give any more, then nobody can blame you for not trying to help

breathe a sigh of relief knowing you've done the best you could and now there are others with fresh energy to take over where you left off.

#61 mario

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Posted 24 August 2012 - 05:17 PM

I am just curious - I have known Jon ince we were kids, he was my best friend for many years...
What happens when they find him? They lock him up somewhere? Put him back out on the streets?
At what point do you have to just allow someone to make the decisions that they make for themselves? If the same pattern of behaviour repeats time and time again despite constantly receving help from people time and time again and a person doesn't seem to want to make any real attempt to change and correct when do you just let go and say - "hey it's your life do as you will?"

33 years old?
50 years old?

Just curious...


Considering he threatened suicide, if the laws down there are the same everywhere else, He will be placed on a 72 hour psychiatric hold at a hospital. During that time, they will try to help him, and determine if he needs to stay there longer. They will contact his family, and that's about it. It's something though. Anyone have any luck reaching him?

#62 Dr. StrangeHat

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Posted 24 August 2012 - 05:25 PM

this! lots of folks here really do care about you, jon.


Agreed...hopefully he reads this and sees how cared for he actually is :heart:

#63 nikkiblue

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Posted 24 August 2012 - 07:50 PM

This thread sucks. How the heck did he make it to South Carolina????
Last I spoke to Jon, I tried to get him to come out here to the island, and we go to the hospital together. I have connections out here with shelters and DSS, but he wanted no part of trying to help himself using the excuse that he had no birth certificate and social services would not help him because of that. really? That kind of stuff can be gotten around. Everything I suggested, he shut down with an excuse. I understand Blind Mule's frustration. I'm angry. NOt really at Jon, but at the helplessness I'm feeling when you try to help someone who is reaching out for help and they keep missing your hand.
Jon, I really hope your OK.

#64 Kashmir

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Posted 24 August 2012 - 08:37 PM

He does find an excuse to shoot down ANY solutions presented to him. But the bipolar nature of his fb posts definitely screams "I need help".
He is either on top of the world, life is great and flips to I'm gonna kill myself in the blink of an eye.

I really hope someone has gotten to him and talked some sense into him :heart:

#65 CharlieHarper

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Posted 24 August 2012 - 08:54 PM

Yeah - he needs to be admitted to a psych ward - seriously. I hope he gets the help he needs

#66 Raynequeen

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Posted 24 August 2012 - 09:21 PM

I spoke w him. He is OK.

#67 Lemireacle

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Posted 24 August 2012 - 09:24 PM

This thread sucks. How the heck did he make it to South Carolina????
Last I spoke to Jon, I tried to get him to come out here to the island, and we go to the hospital together. I have connections out here with shelters and DSS, but he wanted no part of trying to help himself using the excuse that he had no birth certificate and social services would not help him because of that. really? That kind of stuff can be gotten around. Everything I suggested, he shut down with an excuse. I understand Blind Mule's frustration.


He does find an excuse to shoot down ANY solutions presented to him. But the bipolar nature of his fb posts definitely screams "I need help".
He is either on top of the world, life is great and flips to I'm gonna kill myself in the blink of an eye.


I too have seen this several times, and have heard from others who have talked to him about this, not to mention options I've mentioned to him online. He can't really think that everyone who walks into a Social Services office needing assistance is denied because they don't have a birth certificate readily available!! I work for state Social Services, and can say without a doubt that they will most definitely work with people who need assistance, at the very least securing immediate neccessities and assitance to figure out a gameplan for him. If he can't provide a birth certificate, a copy can usually be obtained in a matter of an hour or so, if not quicker.

He can get help he needs, he just needs to want to do so and make the first step to talk to someone. It's incredibly sad, and I hope he realizes that there are lots of people who care about him and want to help him!! :heart:

#68 Kashmir

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Posted 24 August 2012 - 09:28 PM

I spoke w him. He is OK.


Great to hear. Will he go somewhere to get some help?

#69 TheDHJ

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Posted 24 August 2012 - 09:29 PM

If all the illegal immigrants can get services so can Jon.

#70 Raynequeen

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Posted 24 August 2012 - 09:32 PM

We are talking now... I don't know what he will choose but he's communicating.

#71 Kashmir

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Posted 24 August 2012 - 09:33 PM

Irie kate did some extensive research and presented Jon with a multitude of options and help solutions but he refused her feedback and all the info she gathered. The help is definitely available, he just need to be receptive and willing to accept the help.

#72 sarah b.

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Posted 24 August 2012 - 09:48 PM

I <3 Kate.

#73 Tim the Beek

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Posted 24 August 2012 - 09:50 PM

I spoke w him. He is OK.


Glad to read this...

#74 insolent cur

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Posted 24 August 2012 - 10:06 PM

We are talking now... I don't know what he will choose but he's communicating.


this is good. thanks!

he knows people care about him and quite a few folks are very willing to step up and help him negotiate the system. :heart:

#75 nancykind

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Posted 24 August 2012 - 10:33 PM

thanks for letting us know Jackie, i've been so worried all day :heart:

#76 DJ Easy Wind

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Posted 24 August 2012 - 11:54 PM

I just left him a message on VM. I hope he calls back. I told him when he was blissed out a couple weeks ago to watch out for Manic-Depression, his symptoms are text book. The down side is always scarier,l but he needs to get over his aversion to therapy/medication. It's not a silver bullet, but it saves lives fer sure...

#77 DJ Easy Wind

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Posted 25 August 2012 - 12:08 AM

I am just curious - I have known Jon ince we were kids, he was my best friend for many years...
What happens when they find him? They lock him up somewhere? Put him back out on the streets?
At what point do you have to just allow someone to make the decisions that they make for themselves? If the same pattern of behaviour repeats time and time again despite constantly receving help from people time and time again and a person doesn't seem to want to make any real attempt to change and correct when do you just let go and say - "hey it's your life do as you will?"

33 years old?
50 years old?

Just curious...



Sean, when people are in Bi-Polarity, as I believe Jon is, there are prone to delusional thinking, and it can be downright hallucinatory. It is not the kind of space where you can be relied on to make any kind of sound decisions. It is due to an imbalance in brain chemistry. That's why authorities take custody of some folks (5150) and they actually have a judge on-site in some hospitals to render decisions by the State or other jurisdiction to enforce application of medications. It may sound draconian to some, but it actually does save lives. When brain chemistry is more balanced, people can decide for themselves what medication or therapeutic paths they will take or not into the future. Right now, it sounds like Jon needs hospitalization.

Jon, if you are reading this, it may not sound like what you want, but medical services can help you. If you needed medication for diabetes, you wouldn't look down on it. Why not for some mental/emotional stability?

#78 Lostsailr

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Posted 25 August 2012 - 12:44 AM

I love you all for trying. Sure hope Jon stays ok. Often hard to stay on meds when the up side makes one feel so great, but the turn of the page is rough. :heart:

#79 sarah b.

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Posted 25 August 2012 - 12:50 AM

But it's doable. There's only so many wringers caring folks are willing to be put through before they detach with love, if only for self preservation.

#80 Quinn The Eskimo

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Posted 25 August 2012 - 12:24 PM

I am still alive
unfortunately
I can't sleep in my garden anymore because I am worried the police are going to come get me... thanks
that was about all I had left was knowing I had this quiet little spot where I could be left alone
now the police are looking for me there, so I don't have anywhere to be

it rained all night, so i am soaking wet and freezing
didn't eat yesterday
probably not eating today
between not having any shoes and it being cold and wet out I haven't been able to feel my feet in hours
the only clothes I have are soaked through
I am very fucking far from okay
if you really give a shit about me then stop calling the authorities on me and let me rot in peace
I didn't ask for your help
I don't fucking want your help
you aren't helping and haven't helped me one bit
unless you plan on getting me an apartment and paying my bills you can't help me
there is no help for me
I have already tried it before you suggested it and it didn't work
I have been to the hospital
it didn't help me
I have been to the shelters
they didn't help me
I have been to social services
they didn't help me
I have been to churches
they didn't help me
I have have busted my ass trying anything I could think of to get out of this situation and the situation has become steadily worse instead of better and then every now and then things get really bad really quick
maybe you're right
maybe there is something fucked up with my head
okay fine
then what the fuck does that have to do with the price of tea in china?
guess what, bipolar or not, this is really happening and medicine isn't going to put a roof over my head
I am not having mood swings
I am an having really horrible shit happen to me
shit that if it happened to you or any other living breathing person would cause you to feel like shit too
chemical imbalance or not, what I am going through is very fucking real and I am not having mood swings, I am reacting to my circumstances

two days ago, my family, which was all I had left, told me if I ever stepped foot on their property again they would call the police
they told me never to call them again
they told me I was going to spend my life homeless or in jail and they were through dealing with the embarrassment that is me
and after that I walked 7 miles with no shoes, so I could sleep in a park
that fucking happened
and if it happened to you, you'd be pretty upset about it too
I came down here because they were here
they shut me out
I was in new york, sleeping on the streets and had so many people tell me go to your family, they will help you
I knew they wouldn't
I got down here and they told me I couldn't stay with them, but they let me shower and shave there once ever week or two
that's all the help I got from them and now even that is gone

I have had good days, but almost all my days the last 5 months have been really bad days
sometimes I can choose to forget that I am sleeping on the ground, wearing the same clothes everyday, eating out of trash cans
sometimes things get even worse, so much so that I can't pretend everything is okay anymore
if that makes me mentally ill, then fine I am mentally ill
taking a pill isnt going to bring back my clothes and supplies that were stolen a few weeks ago
taking a pill isn't going to feed me
it's not going to get me a job
it's not going to pay rent on a place to sleep
it's not going to make my family give a shit about me either
I am already down and out and I keep getting kicked
so yeah of fucking course I feel like shit
do you really think I'd you had just spent the last four months sleeping on park benches or the wet ground that you'd be cheerful and optimistic?

people from here and elsewhere have made lots of suggestions
thanks for the effort, but nobody has made even one suggestion that I didn't think of long before you suggested it
I already tried it
yet I am still fucking homeless
I have been fucking homeless for 8 months
you really think I haven't checked out the local shelter yet?
I did that shit months ago when I first got into town
going there didn't help a damn thing
oh social services will fix your problem and make your day full of rainbows and unicorns
guess what
I already went
long before you fucking suggested that thats what I needed to do to solve my problems
guess what?
it didnt solve a damn thing
and guess what it took 10 fucking hours to walk there and back, but I tried
I am in the same boat now as I was after all their "help"

the sooner I get up the courage to jump off a bridge the better
I can pretend things are okay for awhile
I can present myself as happy
try and fake it
even start to believe that things aren't as bad as they are
pretend things might actually get better one day
but they won't
this is my life now
stuggling to eat
sleeping in the rain
you all think I need to be in a hospital
what good is that gonna do?
I have been to the the hospital here
they will hold me for three days and then release me
then what?
I will tell you what
I will be in the exact fucking situation I am in now only I will have to walk 15 miles to get back to the part of town I am familiar with
I don't need a hospital
I need a house and a job
if you can give me a house and a job then please let me know
otherwise stop wasting your energy telling me to do a bunch of shit I already tried that didn't help and wasn't worth the effort it took to do

#81 TheDHJ

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Posted 25 August 2012 - 01:01 PM

So how are you posting?

#82 TheDHJ

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Posted 25 August 2012 - 01:04 PM

There's plenty of outreach, you're in Raleigh? I'm sure Catholic Charities would help you. Perhaps you should trespass and go to jail, it's 3 hots and a cot...

Maybe there's a reason your family is done. Any problem can be solved by dancing, right? Well...go do some dancing at social services.

#83 Quinn The Eskimo

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Posted 25 August 2012 - 01:21 PM

I have a phone. I got spent all the miney I made in NY on getting it turned on and paid a few months in advance knowing that coming down here was a mistake and thinking it would be a good idea that if nothing else I would have my phone
my bill is due the 10th and I probably won't get cat off until I am a month overdue, so I should still have some time left thank god

there is no housing assistance here
I can dance all I want at social services, the only assistance offered here is food stamps and I was denied that
if there was a way to have a roof over my head and food in my belly I would have it
I have had several locals tell me their church can help me
their churches gave me a few cans of beans or some pasta that i have absolutely no way to cook and told me they would pray for me
oh yeah actually one church actually had a bunch of clothes they let me dig through
mostly women's clothes and a few suits that wouldn't even come close to fitting me


#84 TheDHJ

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Posted 25 August 2012 - 01:25 PM

Salvation Army? Shelters? There can't be NO services. Try harder. I'll compile a list.

#85 Quinn The Eskimo

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Posted 25 August 2012 - 01:31 PM

yeah
I went to the salvation army
I dont want their help
I have been to 5 different shelters in the last 8 months
3 of them down here
you couldn't pay me to go back

#86 Quinn The Eskimo

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Posted 25 August 2012 - 01:38 PM

look
I am livin this
I have been doing this 24/7 for months
I have internet
there is nothing you can look up on your computer I haven't already come across a hundred time
all I do all day is try to find a way to survive tomorrow
I know I can't fix where I am today, so I have done everything I can to try am fix this
I have walked hundreds if not thousands of miles in pursuit of makeing this right
I have spent hours and hours on the internet, trying to find something that will actually help me
it's not out there
if someone has a REAL solution to my problem I am more than willing to listen, but everytime I am offered any advice or suggested a place to go or number to call I have already been there and done that and I am still right fucking here

#87 hoagie

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Posted 25 August 2012 - 01:48 PM

You can make 4 -5 cents per aluminum can ($.75 per lb) in NC. Start collecting these cans as you come across them, and make what $ you can. Buy a bus ticket to FL. Its mich warmer there, and you can try to find work on a boat.

Idk just some tjoughts. Dont give up on life, and persevere. That is the human way dude.

#88 TheDHJ

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Posted 25 August 2012 - 01:50 PM

Jesus helps those who help themselves. You're in the bible belt for the love of God. What about the local soup kitchen?

#89 Kashmir

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Posted 25 August 2012 - 01:51 PM

People care Jon. But no one is going to provide you what you want. No one is going to give you an apt and money and financial support, that is just unrealistic. People have been in your similar situation and worse. Parents with children, people without education or social abilities and many of them have picked themselves up and made it. You have ro believe you can do it. You are like a mirror, the world reflects what YOU put out. When you put out that defeated, negative vibe that's what you get back.

And you DO want the help. You repeatedly put it out there.....those are cries for help, whether its your intent or not. People might be more apt to want to assist you if you appear to be attempting to help yourself. Posting on facebook about drinking heavily and wishing for a packed bowl isn't very motivating to a person willing to lend a helping hand.

I am concerned for your well-being, Jon. I may not be your BFF from middle school or whatever but I know you well enough that I don't want any harm to come your way.

It may not be enough to you, but I wish you mental, physical and spiritual well-being.

#90 Tim the Beek

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Posted 25 August 2012 - 02:16 PM

Sorry you feel that way man, but I won't feel bad about trying to help someone who was threatening to hurt himself and then dropped off the map. Not ever. I've had friends I love kill themselves. No one should have to suffer through that.

I hope you realize someday how many people care about you, and how concerned they were and are for you.

Last I'll say about it.

#91 Quinn The Eskimo

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Posted 25 August 2012 - 02:20 PM

and I I put out positivity
I have day after day that I go out there motivated and full of good vibes and then I come back to my camp and all my clothes are gone
I get over that and keep on trucking and try and figure out ways to get new clothes and my sandles break
I get use to walking around barefoot and spend a week positive as hell, with absolutely no reason whatsoever to be happy and my family disowns me and leaves me stranded miles from my camp and I no longer have a place to take a weekly shower
I get over that
I try and get over and find oh that now the cops know where I sleep and since I am tresspassing being there I dont even have a safe spot to sleep anymore
I decide I will start sleeping during the day and wondering the streets at night so I dont get arrested and it pours rain on me all night

I keep getting told that same bullshit
I keep trying
I am staying positive most of the time and things keep getting worse
in 5 months I have had a dozen days where I just couldn't handle it anymore I get told that if I believe I can do it good things will come
I did, they haven't
things are only getting worse

what's wrong with wishing I could enjoy a drink or a bowl?
I haven't bought any pot in several months
last time I was drunk was over a year ago
it would be nice, but neither of those things are high on my priority list, I was just saying it would be nice
ya know
to be able to enjoy those things again

I am not looking for someone to give me anything
I dont think there is a possibility in the world that someone is going to put me up and feed me
I am not asking for that
I dont expect that
all I am saying is, short of that I dont think I can survive
I can't do this much longer
all I want is to work hard, so I can support myself
I have spent 8 months trying to find a way to do that and have failed
I am not crazy
I dont think someone is going to support me
I wouldn't want them to if that was on the table and I would never expect it to be
I just don't see any way I will make it otherwise
I obviously am completely incabable of making it in this world
I accept that now
hopefully death will come sooner than later because I can't keep living lime this and there is nothing better coming for me

#92 sarah b.

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Posted 25 August 2012 - 02:45 PM

Are you still unwilling to cut your hair to get a job?
http://raleigh.craigslist.org/jjj/

#93 Quinn The Eskimo

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Posted 25 August 2012 - 02:55 PM

the two months I have been in raleigh I have applied for several hundred listings on craigslist
if cutting my hair would get me a job I would, but I haven't even got an interview yet
I actually scraped up money for dress pants, shirts and shoes so if I did get an interview I could look good for it
all my clothes and everything were stolen
the shoes and dress pants still had the tags on them
I dont even have shoes anymore, I dont think anyone is going to hire the smelly guy in patchwork pants with no shoes
I am well aware of craigslist and have spent countless hours in there
I have have written probbly thousands of cover letter over the last several months and I have had one interview in the last year of job hunting
I thought cutting my hair would magically make a job appear I woild pull out my pocket knife and cut it off right now

#94 gregoir

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Posted 25 August 2012 - 03:07 PM

Cut your fucking hair. find a way to get shoes. Put the nicest clothes you have on and start walking into places and apply for jobs. Oh poor fucking me on the internet is not going to get you anywhere. And yelling at people who called the authorities on you after you were the one that publically threatened suicide is just another example of you blaming all your shit on others.

#95 deadheadskier

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Posted 25 August 2012 - 03:20 PM

can you cook?

there are thousands of restaurants in New England looking for cooks all the time.

#96 Quinn The Eskimo

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Posted 25 August 2012 - 03:23 PM

I have never cooked anything that didnt have microwave directions in my life

#97 Quinn The Eskimo

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Posted 25 August 2012 - 03:24 PM

hasnt stopped me from applying though
I have put in application to hundreds of restaurants


#98 Col_Sandoz

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Posted 25 August 2012 - 03:32 PM

Detaches with Love

#99 TheDHJ

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Posted 25 August 2012 - 03:36 PM

Cut your fucking hair. find a way to get shoes. Put the nicest clothes you have on and start walking into places and apply for jobs. Oh poor fucking me on the internet is not going to get you anywhere. And yelling at people who called the authorities on you after you were the one that publically threatened suicide is just another example of you blaming all your shit on others.


All I hear are cop outs and woe is me.

#100 Quinn The Eskimo

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Posted 25 August 2012 - 03:40 PM

Cut your fucking hair. find a way to get shoes. Put the nicest clothes you have on and start walking into places and apply for jobs. Oh poor fucking me on the internet is not going to get you anywhere. And yelling at people who called the authorities on you after you were the one that publically threatened suicide is just another example of you blaming all your shit on others.


I dont have "nicest clothes"
I have one tshirt and one pair of patchwork pants
when I did, I filled out applications at every single business within walking distance

and what the fuck difference does my hair make?
I have had one interview in a year of job hunting
I got hired on the spot
not a single employer has had a chance to judge me on my hair, because none have even called me for an interview
nobody opening their email has any clue what I look like
how the fuck is cutting my hair going to help anything?
my hair isnt holding me back one bit

I haven't had shoes in two weeks
you think if it was as easy as that I wouldn't already have another pair?
I mean really
you think I want to walk around with no shoes and tattered clothing
you know how many people stop what they are doing to point and laugh at me?
you know how that feels?
if I knew how to get shoes I would
help I even put a post on craigslist begging for clothes and shoes
how the hell can you sit there and tell me to find a way to get shoes when you have no idea how much time I have dedicated to trying to do that?